Chapter 101 To Save a Life
~ SASHA ~
She woke to find Zev staring down at her, his long, dark lashes outlining his eyes—which looked an even brighter blue than usual because his jaw was deeply shadowed by two days growth.
"Hey," she croaked, then realized she was leaning against him and sat up. "Sorry!" She rubbed her eyes and looked around. Dunken was gone and they were alone.
Her stomach trilled.
"I hope you slept okay. It wasn't the most comfortable bed."
"Are you kidding, laying on you is the best bed I can—" she clapped her hand over her mouth and stared at him wide eyed.
Zev's smile beamed, his eyes twinkling. "Well, same here," he said, then leaned in to kiss her.
Sasha whimpered a little bit and put a hand to his neck as the kiss turned soft and probing. She was the one to pull back, Zev's eyes opening more slowly to meet hers.
"You okay?" he asked softly.
She nodded. "I'm just… very aware of… everything," she said lamely. "This whole thing, Zev—what's happened to you since you've been gone, what's happening now. It's a lot."
He nodded. "I know. I'm sorry. But I'm going to clear it all up. I've been talking to Dunken. I'm going to have to challenge Xar and take Alpha," he said. "He's determined to remove you from me—I don't know why. Maybe just because he lost his mate and he can't stand the thought of someone else finding theirs. I don't know. But for whatever reason, I can't leave you here without me for so long. Dunken's going to help me, and some of the others will too."
"Help you do what?"
"Help me challenge him up front. Force him to acknowledge me. So I don't have to make it through all the other layers of the hierarchy first."
Sasha blinked. "If that was an option, why didn't you just start there?"
"Because it's risky. Fighting for dominance… it generally doesn't end in death, Sash. We do it to prove our strength, to find which of us is more determined, stronger—who has the most support from the clans. But if I take Xar out this way… he'll try to kill me. And he might not submit until I kill him. I hope it won't come to that. But at least it means we'll be together sooner, right?"
"Kill you? You'd kill him?"
"I don't want to," he reminded her. He turned to sit face her, cross legged in the dirt. "I didn't want any of this. But he's set me up now. The males… they're coming for you, Sash. As soon as you appear out there they're not going to hold back any more."
"They were holding back?"
Zev snorted. "A lot. The Alphas especially. They've been watching to see what would happen. But now… now they'll actively try to seduce you, to sway you from bonding with me."
"But… we're already bonded."
"It's a different kind of bond, Sash. Most of them don't even realize we have it. It doesn't smell the same. Until they see us together and we're past all this dramatic bullshit, they aren't going to recognize it. So just prepare yourself. You're going to gain a lot of male attention in the next twenty four hours."
"Why twenty-four? What's happening?"
"I promised I would give Dunken twenty-hours to spread the information, the truth, about what happened with the females so the Chimera that are willing to listen will be less likely to stand in my way. But after that… tomorrow night at the latest, I'm taking Xar down."
Sasha's heart swelled, half in pride at his confidence, and half with fear.
Her mind filled, suddenly, with visions of him fighting the way he'd fought that thing back in the parking lot—no hesitations, ruthless, snapping its neck in the end.
He would do that to Xar?
For her?
She couldn't decide if it was endlessly romantic, or the sickest thing she'd ever heard. Maybe both?
"What is it?" Zev asked suddenly, putting a hand to her arm. "What were you just thinking? Why do you smell like you're pulling away?"
"I don't want you to have to kill anyone, Zev! We should be able to just… to just walk into this… whatever we have, without someone else having to die for it."
"No one else will die unless they forced me to it, Sasha. But Chimera are not humans. Our traditions are different. If a male challenges you to the death, there is honor in it. If two are so strong that they can't beat each other without stealing life it means the Chimera was a strong adversary, and they'll be remembered for it."
"Doesn't he have kids, though? Didn't you say—"
Zev raked a hand through his hair, his face tight and disturbed. "I told you, Sash, I won't kill him unless it's the only way to live myself."
"Do you promise?"
"Promise what?"
"That you won't kill anyone unless they force you to? Unless they're going to kill you if you don't."
"Yes," he said simply, his brow lined. "Sasha I take no joy in killing anyone, ever. I will never take a life unless there's actual need. I can't say the same for Xar, though. He seems to be very invested in putting me in positions to die without dirtying his own hands, the fucker."
Something passed behind his eyes then, something that dragged him down and away—the same way he'd looked before he started shaking earlier. Sasha didn't even think about it, just reached for him, putting a hand to his neck and leaning close.
He blinked and focused on her, his smile creeping up hesitantly as he measured her for her intent.
Sasha swallowed. "I don't understand everything that's happening, Zev. Not here in this world, and not to you. I feel like what we need is time to just be together and talk. But I want you to know that I think… I believe in us. I want to be with you—I just feel… nervous. So if you promise me you won't go killing people who don't need killing, I'll promise you that… I'll keep my promise that I'm never going to give my heart to someone else. Okay?"
He stared, searching her eyes, and that glint of fear or rage whatever it had been, faded from his gaze.
"I was deceived, Sash. I was manipulated, and I wish I'd never left you. But you have my word—I won't kill anyone, except in defense of my own life, or yours. And once this is behind us… we're taking a break together, completely alone so we can be together and… just be. You're mine, Sasha, whether they recognize it or not. And I'm going to show you. I'm going to make sure there's never another day in your life where you have to doubt it."
Then he kissed her, and Sasha's heart wanted to explode.