Demon's Journey

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*****

~ SASHA ~

Sasha closed the door softly behind her and turned to walk over to the steps and stand next to where Lhars sat, pulling the blanket around herself.

She didn't know how he sat out here in his furs without freezing, but he didn't seem concerned.

"What are you doing?" she asked calmly.

Lhars looked at her then away. "Guarding my brother while he's weak."

"Your brother, or me?"

Lhars snorted. "You made your position clear. But Zev is a target, as the wolf Alpha. I won't allow him to be harmed. If we have anyone who's still working with the humans, or who has some crazy idea to avenge Xar in some way… I won't allow it."

"So, you do care about Zev?" she asked bluntly.

Lhars tipped his head and looked at her thoughtfully, and his face, his eyes, his expression was so similar to Zev's for a moment Sasha's heart squeezed with love for her mate. She looked over her shoulder, back towards the building, but she couldn't go to him. Not yet.

"I care about what Zev represents to our people," Lhars said carefully. "And… I don't want to see him dead."

"He cares about you, too, Lhars. He's just… he struggles to trust."

Lhars shook his head. "My brother thinks he's the only male who's grown up in the past few years."

Sasha didn't know if that was true, but she also thought it wasn't her argument to have. So she stepped down onto the top stair and sat a couple feet from Lhars, hunched over her knees and frowned out at the night.

The moon was out, the sky clear tonight after the storm, which was why it was so cold, Sasha realized.

She hadn't spent much time on this side of the village. There was a wide open space in front of her, but there was a cold cookfire in the middle of the clearing, and the treeline was peppered with other, smaller buildings.

Moonlight turned the ground silver-gray, with the deepest black shadows under even the tiniest rock.

Sasha wished she could have enjoyed it with Zev. She swallowed the pinch in her throat. He was going to be fine in a couple days. They all said so.

"Is there something I can help you with?" Lhars asked quietly.

Sasha sighed. "I missed the meeting I called with the Wolf Council. How much trouble will that cause?"

Lhars snorted. "It wouldn't have been a problem regardless. Alphas often get torn away from responsibilities in emergencies. But I warned them. I knew you wouldn't want to leave him when he was so vulnerable. They're planning on seeing you tomorrow evening instead."

"Well… thank you," Sasha said, a little stunned. "That was very thoughtful."

Lhars shrugged. "Honestly, I'm used to cleaning up Xar's messes. You're going to be a piece of cake."

Sasha took a deep breath. "Yes, about that… I believe you're someone who will tell me what you really think. Not sugar-coat it. Am I right?"

"Yes."

She waited for the joke, but Lhars just stared at her.

Well then.

She swallowed. "I have a vision for… for the future. But it would be different, I think, than what the Chimera are accustomed to, and if I present this I think… I think Zev won't be honest with me. He'll either tell it's great because he believes in me, or he'll tell me it's terrible because it puts me in danger. I need to know how a… a normal Chimera, someone who didn't know me, would feel."

Lhars nodded. "I can do that."

"Good. So… I'm thinking when I speak to the Council and to the Alphas, I'd like to propose a... dual Alpha."

Lhars frowned. "A what?"

"I think I can help with the humans," Sasha said carefully. "I can't quite see exactly how to begin yet, but I know I can help. Because I can move around both worlds freely. I don't have to hide from humans—or Chimera. And I understand their technology, how they think. How it differs from… here. I think I might be able to see ways forward the Chimera might not come up with."

Lhars nodded for her to continue.

"I'm not Chimera, though. I'm not strong enough to take a physical challenge—and that leaves the hierarchy vulnerable if I'm Alpha. Plus, it's entirely possible that I will offend people by accident. Sometimes the way I think or the things I do, they're different."

Lhars shrugged. "None of us are the same."

"I mean in ways that could create problems, though," she said. "What if… how would I go about getting Zev appointed as Male Alpha, and keep myself as Female Alpha? We could rule together—I would handle things with the humans, and he could handle everything with you all."

Lhars brows rose. Sasha was grateful that he didn't immediately respond, but turned to look out over the clearing and consider what she'd said.

"That's definitely something new," Lhars said. "Though I suspect the wolves, at least, wouldn't struggle too much with it. Our ancestors share the authority. But the others? The tigers? The goats? They're all accustomed to a lonely throne."

"Really, Zev would be it," Sasha said quietly. "But I know he won't let me just give him the Alpha. He's afraid more change is only to make everything more fragile—what do you think? About this change, I mean? Will it make us as a people stronger or weaker?"

Lhars turned his head quickly, examining her.

"What?" Sasha asked, taken off guard.

"You said, 'us.'"

Sasha shrugged. "Yes."

"You see yourself as Chimera?"

Sasha laughed. "I'm no Chimera. But I am here. I want… I want the Chimera to win. I'm Zev's mate. And he's mine. This is… I want this to be my home."

Lhars hesitated a moment, then one side of his mouth curled up into a smile. "You will do well, Sasha-don," he said quietly, looking back out on the clearing. "You and Zev will do well."

She didn't miss the ring of sadness in his tone.

And she thought she knew where it came from, too.

"Thank you," she said carefully. Then with a deep breath, "You know, if anyone had told me a month ago that today I'd be here, with Zev, mated and connected… I would have laughed in their faces."

Lhars shrugged. "I'm happy for you."

"No, Lhars, look at me."

He turned, warily. Sasha tried to just look compassionate. She'd hated it when she was heart-broken and people spoke to her like she was a child.

"What I'm saying is… don't give up hope."

He waited a beat too long before asking, "I don't know what you mean."

Sasha had to stop herself from rolling her eyes. Bloody men and their egos.

"I mean, Kyelle," she said softly.

Lhars tensed, but she plowed on.

"Don't give up ho—"

"Don't," he spat in a dead, cold voice. "Just… don't."

Sasha shut her mouth and waited, thinking, trying to anticipate what would help him. But Lhars' knee began to jiggle, then he shoved to his feet.

"You don't have to leave, Lhars. If you don't want to talk about it, I won't push you. I didn't mean to make you leave. I'm grateful that you're here for him."

Then Lhars whirled, and Sasha stiffened.

Even in the moonlight she could see the rage burning in his eyes.