The Immortal’s Poison

Ma Heshui’s three billion and four hundred million alveoli erupted in rage (Author’s note: I have intentionally looked it up from Baidu, it turns out there are three to four billion alveoli in a human’s body). He was about to turn hostile and strike the first blow there and then. Unexpectedly, Wen Tunhai continued to speak, "Wen Leyang is already married. The Bureau of Civil Administration will never agree with him marrying once more… Moreover, on this matter about marriage, we, as the senior, do not have any regards to this. We also can’t make a decision on this."

Ma Heshui heaved a long sigh as he regained his composure. With his gaze still as desolated as before, "Wen Leyang is married? How come I was not aware of that? Who is his wife then?" His speech was directed at the First Uncle, yet his stared firmly at Wen Leyang, who was standing in the crowd and who had just took out a stick of carrot.

Mumu was hesitating whether she should step forward, a gust of fragrant wind brushed past her body. A graceful shadow of a human figure had already stepped forward and smiled towards Ma Heshui, "It’s me! I am his recently married wife!"

The Wen family, the Luo family, the Miao clansmen, the fat monk, the old monk, A Dan on top of the delicate pony, all stood with their mouths agape.

Ma Heshui could feel that the vision before his eyes brightened. A charming and graceful woman broke out into a smile towards him. It was as if all the sunshine in the world was absorbed by her smile in the blink of an eye.

Chang Li leaped forward. It was such an interesting matter. She would be disappointed if she did not seize the opportunity to make an entrance scene. Setting aside the matter of passing off as Wen Leyang’s wife, she would not mind even if she had to pretend to be Mumu’s husband.

Ma Heshui had already seen Chang Li the moment he entered the village. She was just a normal-looking beautiful woman in the crowd. He did not pay particular attention to her. Yet, unexpectedly when she finally stood out from the crowd, she was so brilliant and charming that one dared not look her in the eyes.

Facing Chang Li’s smile that was as bright as stars, Ma Heshui gave a rarely-seen smile and used a soft voice to speak, "Gather your items and descend the mountain. From this day onwards, end all contact with Wen Leyang. Ma Heshui will ensure your peace and tranquility for the rest of your life. My niece is not a random person, she will never share a husband with another woman."

Chang Li blinked her eyes innocently but she did not speak. As Wen Tunhai saw that the grand master grandmother had already leaped forward, he shut his mouth and stopped speaking. After a long while, the Wen family village was still in a perfect silence.

Chang Li finally stomped her foot once as she turned around and stared at Wen Leyang, "Why don’t you say something then!"

Wen Leyang was still in a muddled state now, he stared back at Chang Li with his enlarged eyes, "Say… say what?"

Chang Li scolded in a happy yet angry manner, "You’re just the same as him, such a foolish idiot! Someone is trying to ask your wife to leave. If you don’t say something, who will say something then?"

"So do I let you go…or not let you go?" Wen Leyang was completely confused, regardless whether it was Wen Xiaoyi, Mumu or even the Second Mother who was trying to put up an act, he could still play along smilingly. It was only Chang Li whom he could not, as she was the wife of the grand master grandfather. He was afraid that if he were to speak of anything, a divine thunder would come lashing down at him from the sky and he would have to escape by the guiding of the thunder, just like his grand master grandfather.

Chang Li’s bright eyes peered at him with slanted eyes, "You still don’t know if you should let me go or not?"

Wen Leyang truly did not know.

Chang Li with her helpless expression gave up and no longer acknowledge the silly lad. She looked towards Ma Heshui once again and slightly bobbled her head, "Wen Leyang is definitely not up for a betrothal. He has a wife now, but within our Wen family village, there are still some good lads around…" As she was saying that, Chang Li turned around and pointed to Wen Buzuo.

Wen Buzuo shouted as loud as a thunder, "That is right!"

Ma Heshui faintly peered towards Wen Buzuo once, "Your Excellency has a rather loud voice, I will be in close terms with you in a while.

"Sure!" The sound of thunder continued to surge in.

Ma Heshui smiled faintly as he nodded. He stared at Chang Li once again, "You should leave. This pool of water is not yours to wade. The union of the One Word Palace and the Wen family is a joyous event as great as the heaven. It is not related to any outsiders." The experienced man could see through Wen Leyang’s awkwardness earlier that Chang Li’s declaration as Wen Leyang’s wife was pure nonsense. Ma Heshui thought that Chang Li could be an important person of the other two families and she was trying to stand up for the Wen family.

Chang Li was a great demon of a few thousand years old. Even the almost two hundred and fifty years old divine monk Hope Sense thought she was a normal being. Even though Ma Heshui had a rather exceptional cultivation skill, he was still far from being able to truly see through Chang Li’s real identity and her capabilities. So he thought she was just a mortal woman that was rather capable and favored helping others. However, Chang Li’s smile was too charming and he was unwilling to part with it. Hence, Ma Heshui withheld his temper as he advised her with kind words.

Chang Li frowned, she turned around abruptly and asked Wen Xiaoyi, "Hey little girl, if you were a man, and your wife is leaving you right now, what will you do…"

Wen Xiaoyi utterly did not await this grand master grandmother to finish her sentence. She swayed the big-muzzled weapon in her hands and spat out a crisp word, "Fight!"

Chang Li chuckled, she turned around and returned to the crowd. She instructed Wen Leyang, "It’s your turn now!"

Wen Leyang heaved a long sigh. Regardless, he dared not play an act with his grand master grandmother. However, he would be happy to go forward and fight instead. It was just the right opportunity for him to try out the poison that he recently refined in his workshop. He tossed the carrot that was in his hand to Ah Dan as he walked forward with an eager to try expression on his face.

Ma Heshui was unimpressed as he roared with laughter. Before he came, he truly thought that he would only need to declare his intention once and the entire Wen family would be overwhelmed by the flattery and honor. However, in reality, he suffered through continuous setbacks during his journey in ascending the mountain. He had already understood that the people of Wen family were reluctant to submit easily and since he had already embarked on this trip, even if the disciples of Wen Bucao were like spike balls, he would rather be squished like a plasticine dough than to give in. Hence, he entered the village and prepared to strike the first blow.

Ma Heshui had no intention to move at all. The red-shirt man behind him, who was constantly speaking shouted, "The Twelve Moons!"

In Ma Heshui’s eyes, the disciples of Wen Bucao were not threatening to them. Wen Leyang was just a normal being with some rather exceptional natural endowments. He was akin to an unrefined gold ore but he was no different than a boulder.

The ‘Twelve Moons’ had been standing behind the butler Gou witnessing the bustle. They answered in unison upon receiving the orders and walked in great strides towards the center.

The red-shirt man started instructing, "All of you go ahead… what happened to the four of your faces?"

A few days ago when these four boys were on shift duty, they made an opening move to stop and attacked Mumu but Wen Leyang came to her rescue, so they too immediately stopped their fights. Yet, they were caught off guard and were each whipped ferociously by Ah Dan. Their cheeks were still swollen right now.

The Twelve Moons blushed scarlet together. Before they could speak, the sound of a pony’s neigh broke out suddenly. The tattering sound of a pony’s hooves echoed as Ah Dan urged the horse to take two steps forward in a valiant manner. He pointed the carrot in his hand towards the Twelve Moons, while his other hand patted on his chest, making the pattering sound. He appeared awe-inspiring. The little plump boy saw that his defeated opponents were preparing for another fight, so he immediately appeared before the scene in high spirits.

The Twelve Moons saw that Ah Dan was there and they became entirely disheartened. Facing the red-shirt man’s pestering accusations, the leader ‘First Moon’ pointed towards Ah Dan, his voice was like a mosquito’s hum, "It was him who hit us."

The red-shirt man stared so hard that his eyes almost bore into the cheek of ‘First Moon’. He spoke in rage, "What kind of reckless insanity are you having? I am asking you who is the person who injured you!" These twelves disciples were not considered skilled and invincible, yet they were all personally trained by him, especially their four-times-four art of joint attack.

Ah Dan was growing impatient, he rode on the Delicate Pony as he surged forward in an askew manner. His mouth was babbling something unintelligible.

The red-shirt man sneered once, "Kill the pony and the boy for me!" Before they departed, all three supreme leaders had the same intention. They came to threaten the Wen family with their imposing mannerism, to fight when they needed to, but not to get to the point of no return. They only wanted to intimidate the Wen family. Moreover, Ah Dan was just a little baby. Until this point, Ah Dan was already reborn as another person. Without careful expedition, one would never realise that he was actually a zombie baby.

Even though the Twelve Moons were completely disheartened, when they received the order they still shouted in unison. Their body forms were akin to the fallen leaves in the wind as they moved rapidly in a confusing manner. The four persons were akin to raging leopards as they surged forward; each of the four persons procured one piece of magic talisman and slapped it onto their chests. The outlines of their body faded and turned invisible; Finally, the four persons simultaneously raised their hands and guided their sharp and refined treasured weapons. The weapons shuttled past the sky. It was as though the twelve people were confronted by a formidable power, the first blow they struck was in the form of their most powerful killing formation, which they trained hard on usual days. 

The red-shirt man was stunned. He smiled as he said, "Is that even necessary?"

Ah Dan showed no fear at all. His mouth was screaming and howling. Everyone watched as he surged closer and closer, the little pony underneath his buttocks suddenly gave a backward kick abruptly and flipped Ah Dan off its body. It moved with agility as it turned in the opposite direction, turned its head and ran away! The Delicate Pony could really run fast and sustain long runs. However, it had been bred for generations as a pet. It could not venture onto a battlefield. It did not hesitate as it saw a group of big men surging towards its direction, it cast aside its master and fled away.

Ah Dan was just like a Ping-Pong ball. His round body bounced up from the ground. He did not care about his precious pony anymore as he waved around his tiny fists bracing the enemies. Soon after, the sonic boom of flying sleeves was heard, strong wind whistled, twelve people including those who were invisible, those who were attacking by pouncing on the enemy or those who used spells, all skirted away from him and chased after the delicate pony, the leader First Moon was still shouting, "Master Red gave us the instruction, to kill the pony…"

The Twelve Moons swept past akin to the wind, leaving behind the little plump boy Ah Dan, who lost his enemy. He stood on the same spot holding onto a stick of carrot, his eyes blinked absent-mindedly.

The red-shirt man, known as Master Red, felt so embarrassed that he might as well left his face in Songhua River. The twelve storm-chasers youngsters, with a prevailing thirst for blood, spread their legs to chase after a pony while the three families of Wen, Miao and Luo standing opposite grinned from ear to ear. Even though he was still standing behind Ma Heshui right now, he could already sense from the back of the master’s head that Ma Heshui was smoking with a murderous intent.

The red-shirt man stomped with a frenzy of rage, as he roared loudly towards the Twelve Moons, "Get the f*ck back here!" As he was saying that he stretched out his hand and caught the carrot Ah Dan tossed over. He stared at Ah Dan intensely as he cursed, "Little bastard, you have some kind of death wish!"

Ah Dan pouted his lips and used his finger to point towards the red-shirt man, while his other hand patted on his chest, making a challenging gesture.

The red-shirt man turned green with rage. He raised his eyes and looked towards Wen Tunhai, "You disciples of Wen Bucao are really shameless, sending a child to create troubles over here!"

Before Wen Tunhai could speak, Mumu rushed in and laughed, "Still stronger than the twelve robust young lads chasing after the little pony!" Upon saying that she stuck out her tongue towards the First Uncle and made a cheeky apology gesture, after all, she was still a junior generation.

The red-shirt person hated it! Ever since they ascended the mountain they were forced to surrender all the time. He was after all still a famous person in the cultivation world. He could not fight the little baby or quarrel with a young girl, and yet the Twelve Moons were embarrassing him by chasing after a pony. He turned over his hands abruptly and brought out seven pieces of fiery-red beads about the size of the longan fruit as he sneered ferociously, "Hey, Wen family, do you really think that Master Red dare not kill?" Upon saying that he took a step forward and squinted his eyes as he peered at Wen Tunhai. He did not care about everybody and only the First Uncle Wen Tunhai could have matched his standards.

Ma Heshui did not stop him. He quietly said to the Twelve Moons, who had returned sneakily, "Punish yourselves by breaking two fingers each."

Surprisingly, every one of the Twelve Moons heaved a sigh of relief simultaneously, as if Ma Heshui’s punishment was easy. Without any objection, they each held on to their ring finger and little finger of their left hands and pulled strenuously. Their expression did not change at all. On the other hand, Mister Gou could not bear to witness. He heaved a sigh but did not speak.

Wen Tunhai’s smile vanished. He was too lazy to be afflicted with the people of One Word Palace over and over again. He refused to acknowledge the red-shirt man as he spoke to Ma Heshui without consulting anyone, "The Wen family is nothing but a poor, humble family, I can never understand, why does an impressive, precious daughter of the One Word Palace’s supreme leader wants to be married off to the Nine Peaks Mountain."

Wen Leyang nodded strenuously from the side. He was there to fight, following Chang Li’s instruction, yet no one acknowledged his presence at all. So, he had been standing for a long while without doing anything.

Ma Heshui raised his eyebrow. He did not answer Wen Tunhai’s question but he asked in reply, "But why shouldn’t Nineteen be married off to here? Does it bring disgrace to all you disciples of Wen Bucao?"

Wen Xiaoyi chuckled once and stuck out her tongue towards Mumu, "That little girl is called Nineteen? Why is her name so strange?"

There was another person, who was standing in the same spot doing nothing like Wen Leyang: the red-shirt man. He brandished his treasured weapon in preparation to strike a blow to intimidate the Wen family initially. Yet, Wen Tunhai decided to start talking to his master, he could not start fighting and he could not retreat as well.

"Understood." Wen Tunhai nodded his head as if he was deep in thoughts. Suddenly, he broke out in a smile to Ma Heshui, "Since she is the precious daughter of the supreme leader of the One Word Palace, I think we ought to invite the supreme leader to personally come here and discuss. Everyone please kindly return to where you came from. With the exception of that chef, who is an expert in cooking fish, please return."

Ma Heshui’s expression was obviously stunned. He smiled from extreme rage, "Oh, the disciples of Wen Bucao, oh, all of you are savages who are not aware of the immensity of the universe…"

Before he could finish his sentence, a thunder-like voice echoed from Wen Buzuo’s mouth towards the sky, "Do you think it is worthwhile to do this for a chef?"

Seeing his master in rage, the red-shirt man finally did not feel awkward anymore. He shouted in a low, muffled voice, the seven fiery-red longan beads surged skywards. Following the rhythm of the muttering of incantations, the beads formed into a circle and spun around rapidly.

Chang Li had utterly forgotten about Wen Leyang right now. She saw that the opposing party was preparing to launch an attack so she patted on Wen Xiaoyi’s shoulder once in an elated manner, as she asked in a low voice, "Have you given the Thunder Heart Sand a grand opening ceremony already?"

Wen Xiaoyi with her glimmering eyes, she raised the big-muzzled weapon and aimed towards the people of One Word Palace as she shouted in a clear voice, "Everyone leaves, the chef stays!"

Wen Leyang was joyously preparing to make the opening move with his poison trial. Yet, when he saw that the little girl had raised her big-muzzled weapon. He screamed in surprise as he grabbed Ah Dan and ran away to the side.

Facing the big-muzzled weapon in Wen Xiaoyi’s hands, Ma Heshui and the red-shirt man and the green-shirt man were driven to madness by their rage. The Wen family had not brought out any worthy weapon since the beginning until this very moment, Ma Heshui instructed his workers loudly, "It is okay if a few people are killed."

The red-shirt man gave a long and savage howl. He paid utterly no attention to the big-muzzled weapon in Wen Xiaoyi’s hands as he stared at Wen Buzuo closely with his sharp eyes. The red-colored beads in the sky erupted into seven humongous fireballs with a loud bang in the air and linked up to form a burning fire dragon.

Wen Buzuo was nervous. He shuffled his footsteps secretly and hid behind Chang Li.

Wen Leyang was the future son-in-law, Wen Tunhai was the core personage of the Wen family. Even if the red-shirt man wanted to try to kill in order to display his power this time, he did not want to form a deep vengeance with the Wen family. He also did not want to degrade himself to fuss about with the few little girls like Wen Xiaoyi, Mumu and Chang Li. He looked up and down and finally decided that Wen Buzuo was the most suitable candidate. He could transmit his voice all the way to the foothill, so he must be a person fluent in magic spells. This way he needed not to use his cultivation abilities to bully a mortal person. Ji Fei and Shui Jing were much smarter. Ever since Ma Heshui came up to the mountain, the two brothers hid behind the crowd and refused to speak at all.

However, the red-shirt man was not aware that, setting aside the fact that Wen Buzuo was an important figure in the Death Trademark, even if he were to kill a dog in the Wen family village, it would draw a mad revenge from this group of poison ancestors…

The sky erupted into a huge quake. Millions of streaks of lightning bolt struck in a flash. Streaks upon streaks of enchanting purple arcs were akin to poisonous snakes plunging wildly. Strong wind and thunder enshrouded in great numbers from all directions. It utterly filled every crevice in everybody’s eyes. The visible air was akin to a rough sea as it raged and roared everywhere. In the sunny summer sky, a gigantic hole was knocked out forcefully from Wen Xiaoyi’s shot.

The string-of-bead fireballs transformed from seven longan fire beads had no chance at even struggling in the incessant lightning. It was swallowed fully, in a flash.

The red-shirt man gave out a loud shrill scream. He spat out a gust of blood skywards and fell back heavily. The First Uncle Wen Tunhai responded rather quickly. His body swayed once before he caught the red-shirt man and tossed him over to the green-shirt man, who was still standing in a daze behind Ma Heshui.

Wen Xiaoyi was still unwilling to kill in the end. She blasted her big-muzzled weapon in the direction of the treasured weapon launched by the red-shirt man in midair.

Chang Li peered at her, being exasperated that Xiaoyi did not live up to her expectations. She shook her head and heaved a sigh.

Wen Xiaoyi grinned, her movements were agile as she reloaded the weapon. At the sound of a snap, the big-muzzled weapon regained its combat effectiveness once again.

Ah Dan, with both of his hands tightly pressed against his ears, closed his eyes and pursed his lips strenuously, his little face was squeezed into a ball.

The person with the most splendid expression was none other than Ma Heshui. This master suffered through endless vile bullies ever since he entered the mountain. He felt that he needed not to fight personally all along. He thought that the moment his workers brandished their treasured weapon, the disciples of Wen Bucao would be shocked. Hence, he had always thought that he was more superior.

When the red-shirt man made an opening move with his treasured weapon, Ma Heshui was very gratified.

His remaining pride, his amazement and his deep disbelief, were mangled together. It turned into a sense of helplessness that seeped into his bones. It was as if his group of people slung eight Nambu Type 14 pistols valiantly and spiritedly and ascended the mountain. Yet, they realised that the fellow villagers were equipped with tanks and rockets…

The loud quake in the sky had almost dispersed off. Ma Heshui had only noticed that he was still using his little finger to point at the big-muzzled weapon. He hastily retracted his finger and stood upright. He was wondering what to say next and Gou Changxi had walked in quick strides and stood in between the two opposing parties. He gave a forced smile as he waved his arms with all his might, "What is going on over here? I thought you were discussing a grand joyous event, it turned into a misunderstanding…"

Wen Buzuo was full of enthusiasm, he gave a thunder-like ‘bah’, "Joyous event? The string of beads that came crashing down earlier had almost turned this into a mournful event!"

Ma Heshui had only recovered from his surprise now. He took a deep breath and regained his master cultivator’s dignified manner. He took a look at Wen Xiaoyi’s big-muzzled weapon and spoke in a down-to-earth manner, "The disciples of Wen Bucao have family properties that are accumulated over the past two thousand years. Ma Heshui has indeed underestimated all of you in the beginning. I appreciate the young maiden’s mercy earlier too." As he was saying that, he unexpectedly made an obeisance by cupping his hand in the other hand before his chest to the First Uncle and the elders of the Wen family, as a sign of appreciation. If Wen Xiaoyi were to fire the gun at them, perhaps their corpses would not be found by now. 

"However, this treasured weapon’s formidable force is albeit outstanding," Ma Heshui’s tone of speaking changed unexpectedly, and became solemn, "never say that it requires the combined force of the entire One Word Palace, but just the two of us here can perhaps destroy it already!" Before his voice died away, the green-shirt man standing behind him in constant silence suddenly chucked lightly, like a gust of wind he swept past the sky swiftly. He was so swift it was impossible to seize his shadow, he was before everyone’s eyes just now and he appeared once again decameters away almost simultaneously. Wen Xiaoyi’s muzzled weapon was no match for his movements.

Ma Heshui pushed forward with both of his hands. He did not appear to have tossed out any treasured weapon, yet another continuous chilly long howls echoed from midair abruptly. An eagle alternating in red and green color flashed past everyone’s head and vanished in midair.

Ma Heshui looked towards Wen Xiaoyi and chuckled once, "That gun of yours, how many people can you hit? I bet you can’t fire a second shot before they get you."

Wen Xiaoyi’s big-muzzled weapon was albeit incisive, yet when the enemy was fully prepared and attacked in great numbers from all directions, she would not be able to fire a second shot at the enemy. Ma Heshui had a sharp eyesight. He could tell that the vulnerability of this and at one look, Wen Xiaoyi was no one but a normal little girl. He was uncertain how did she acquired such a stupendously powerful treasured weapon but, just with that weapon of hers, the One Word Palace with profound cultivation foundation had no respect for it.

The green-shirt man scurried faster and faster in midair. He was so swift that he bedazzled everyone. It was as if he was going all out to claim back some dignity from Ma Heshui.

Ma Heshui’s dull speech was to save back some of his reputation as well. As he continued to speak, "The One Word Palace and the Wen family of Nine Peaks Mountain will unite by marriage…" Unexpectedly before he could finish his sentence, the green-shirt man that was shuttling back and forth recklessly in midair suddenly gave out an agonizing scream. He slammed hard onto the ground and writhed in agony. A series of gigantic blood-filled blisters surged up continuously, disappearing and surging up again and again on his skin…

The First Uncle Wen Tunhai’s smiled boringly, "Wen Bucao’s legacy has been passed down for generations for two thousand years. We do not depend on some treasured weapon."